A Simple Man
By Blizzard Actual*
Forget your lust for the rich man’s gold
All that you need is in your soul,
And you can do this if you try.
All that I want for you my son,
Is to be satisfied. -Lynyrd Skynyrd
My back is a little sore right now, and I couldn’t be happier. I’m relishing this dull throb so much that the idea of taking a few hundred milligrams of ibuprofen would be heresy. Friday night, a buddy’s wife shot me a text message politely asking for a hand. She and my buddy were stepping up their back-yard game and going to have 800 square feet of sod put down. Insta-lawn! Where I come from, there is so much grass we do everything we can to kill it off. Or just pasture off the front yard and buy some goats (true story bro).
Here’s the obvious catch; one does not simply just unroll grass in your backyard. The yard must be leveled, irrigation trenches must be dug, pipes must be connected, a layer of mulch is applied, and then the sod is laid out. Since the sod/grass rolls are a living entity and delivered on a tight schedule, this is a time sensitive project that while not rocket science is a bit of a dance.
Their best quote for this job was $1500 plus the cost of materials. Thankfully, they knew a guy who knows a guy who’s wife took him the cleaners so now he does weekend landscaping jobs when he isn’t landscaping for another company during the week. He quoted them $500 for the complete job if my buddy could supply two additional people. The guy estimated that it would be a two-day job. The thought of me giving up both of my off-duty days (particularly when they both fell on a coveted “normal-people’s-weekend”) didn’t exactly excite me, but they are called “friends” for a reason.
Flashback…
In 1994, my father built new barn on our farm. For months, every Saturday a crew of 7-20ish men would assemble at my parents’ house around 6am. Some were family, some were neighbors, and some were guys that worked with my dad at the steel mill. Breakfast was at 6, work started at 7. Work lasted until 4-5 in the afternoon. No one was late, no one left early, and no one complained. I was 10 that summer. In the beginning my job was to fetch cool water from the hydrant for drinking and pick up stray nails (we were on a budget after all). By the end of the summer I had learned to read a tape measure, mix cement, hold the graduated pole for the transit operator, and run a hammer or shovel with a reasonable degree of efficiency.
I never thought about it at the time, but when the guys showed up to work, my dad never had to divide them into work crews based upon skill sets. They just self organized and went to work with minimal direction. Every man could work cement, lay block, perform basic carpentry skills, slap tin on rafters, and none of them were afraid of heights. What I did wonder was how they knew how to do all of this stuff when none of them did any of these things as a profession. Like my father, they were all either farmers or mill workers. I just imagined that there was some sort of secret Hogwarts-style school of manliness (most likely run by Ron Swanson) that I would attend someday and be just like these guys.
Now I know there is no such school. You learn your daily grind by doing your daily grind. But if you want to learn new skills, you show up and you work. Often this means working on your off-duty days for free. Other than a good home cooked meal and the expectation that someday they will return the favor, no compensation is expected nor accepted. As I got older, my dad would give me the run down on Friday nights that my Saturday would be occupied accompanying him to help someone do something. After Saturday morning football practice, I often drove directly to the site and took my place among the other men and boys. The women cooked, and they cooked well. Napoleon was right, an army does move on its stomach. Pizza does not go over well in situations like these.
Present day…
The job wasn’t that bad. Lots of moving dirt, leveling, digging trenches, and mulching. My buddy and I took direction from the landscaper. We did the heavy lifting, shoveling, trenching, and leveling. He did the finesse work of pipe fitting and sprinkler installation. Every now and then he would give us subtle prompts to keep the pace going. The weather was warm but not oppressive. His wife made delicious roast beef sandwiches for lunch.
By 4pm, the three of us looked at the freshly mulched yard and decided to make this a one-day affair. We hustled to get the sod down by dark. By 5:30, approximately 800 square feet of beautiful smelling green grass was in place. His 2 year old couldn’t stop running around on it, shrieking with joy.
The sun set at 5:40 exactly, and I had learned a new skill. I’m no master, but if you ever need some landscaping done, a hog butchered, a building erected or various other odd tasks, give me a call. I’ll work all day for free, but I don’t work for pizza.
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Blizzard Actual is a friend of Overwatch Designs and no stranger to writing. Blizzard Actual has written and will likely continue to write blog posts and reviews for our friend, Will, at www.blacksheepwarrior.com. Blizzard Actual has a wealth of knowledge, education, and real world experience. We are happy to have him add to our blog. We hope you enjoy his writing and outlook on the experiences of this crazy world.
You can follow Blizzard Actual on Instagram or contact him by writing love notes to blizzard_actual@yahoo.com